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May 15
There’s so much going on in this image I don’t know where to begin! I’ll take it left to right. First you’ve got the kid in the flip-flops and the nalgene wearing a t-shirt that proudly declares “Obama? Fine By Me.” Fine by me. What does that tepid bullshit even mean?! Is that ironic or something? Who would ever pay money for a t-shirt that basically says “Obama? Ho-Hum!” “Obama? Hmmmmmm….. Sure.” Effective. Then there are all the rest of the Obama supporters, who really I just assume are supporters because they’re all wearing navy, sandals, and are taking pictures with their phones, which is probably the most I’ve seen out of any Obama supporter since the inauguration. What used to be YES WE CAN now gets summed up by a wishy-washy t-shirt, Tevas and a TwitPic. We. Fucking. Won. Moving on to Alan Keyes, the GOP’s ‘other black guy’, who probably has more ability than any other living person to completely discredit anything he throws his political might behind. How he suddenly became the face of the anti-abortion movement is beyond me, but not really, because just like Michael Steele Alan’s distaste for Obama is trumped only by his envy of him. He hates Obama, wishes he were Obama, and so he’s pushing a Sponge Bob (who is gay, fyi) stroller with a bludgeoned Cappage Patch doll in it as a way of bringing this dichotomous mental dilemma to life, as it were. (The dead baby represents Keys’ ambition, the homo stroller symbolizes the American electorate.) I don’t want to get too hung up on Keyes, because just to his right, just past the crying lady with the fetus on her chest, is probably the highlight of this whole scene. No, not the I REGRET MY ABORTION sign. Not to make light of abortion, but you regretting your abortion is somehow a convincing argument against abortion? Get out of town! That is such a weird coincidence because I regret not having an abortion. True story. Kids ruined my life because I had them way too young and forgot that I actually hate children, and since I was an incompetent parent they all grew up to be liberals or some other horrible thing… That last part wasn’t true. But! Back to the most amazing part of the photo: the guy in the Obama mask COVERED IN BLOOD. It’s Halloween! Obama, who has himself performed MANY partial-birth (and post-birth) abortions, forgot to wear scrubs last time he kid killed and got the afterbirth and guts all over his grey turtleneck and is smiling about it! Oh shit where’s my iPhone I totally have to Twitter that. Aaaaaaaaaand, oh yeah, also… YAAAAWN… Obama.

There’s so much going on in this image I don’t know where to begin! I’ll take it left to right. First you’ve got the kid in the flip-flops and the nalgene wearing a t-shirt that proudly declares “Obama? Fine By Me.” Fine by me. What does that tepid bullshit even mean?! Is that ironic or something? Who would ever pay money for a t-shirt that basically says “Obama? Ho-Hum!” “Obama? Hmmmmmm….. Sure.” Effective.

Then there are all the rest of the Obama supporters, who really I just assume are supporters because they’re all wearing navy, sandals, and are taking pictures with their phones, which is probably the most I’ve seen out of any Obama supporter since the inauguration. What used to be YES WE CAN now gets summed up by a wishy-washy t-shirt, Tevas and a TwitPic. We. Fucking. Won.

Moving on to Alan Keyes, the GOP’s ‘other black guy’, who probably has more ability than any other living person to completely discredit anything he throws his political might behind. How he suddenly became the face of the anti-abortion movement is beyond me, but not really, because just like Michael Steele Alan’s distaste for Obama is trumped only by his envy of him. He hates Obama, wishes he were Obama, and so he’s pushing a Sponge Bob (who is gay, fyi) stroller with a bludgeoned Cappage Patch doll in it as a way of bringing this dichotomous mental dilemma to life, as it were. (The dead baby represents Keys’ ambition, the homo stroller symbolizes the American electorate.)

I don’t want to get too hung up on Keyes, because just to his right, just past the crying lady with the fetus on her chest, is probably the highlight of this whole scene. No, not the I REGRET MY ABORTION sign. Not to make light of abortion, but you regretting your abortion is somehow a convincing argument against abortion? Get out of town! That is such a weird coincidence because I regret not having an abortion. True story. Kids ruined my life because I had them way too young and forgot that I actually hate children, and since I was an incompetent parent they all grew up to be liberals or some other horrible thing…

That last part wasn’t true.

But! Back to the most amazing part of the photo: the guy in the Obama mask COVERED IN BLOOD. It’s Halloween! Obama, who has himself performed MANY partial-birth (and post-birth) abortions, forgot to wear scrubs last time he kid killed and got the afterbirth and guts all over his grey turtleneck and is smiling about it!

Oh shit where’s my iPhone I totally have to Twitter that. Aaaaaaaaaand, oh yeah, also… YAAAAWN… Obama.

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