(1) We support smaller government, smaller national debt, lower deficits and lower taxes by opposing bills like Obama’s “stimulus” bill;

America is $12 trillion in debt. The stimulus plan cost $787 billion (and as for those scare quotes, it was apparently worth it). But that doesn’t matter. Whether you agree with the stimulus or not, it isn’t up for renewal. It happened. So opposing it now doesn’t do anything to reduce the deficit. Alternately, neither will lowering taxes. You can’t just say you’re for lower deficits and reduced spending. PROPOSE a way to make this happen. Anyone.

(2) We support market-based health care reform and oppose Obama-style government run health care;

We are opposed to Medicare, Medicaid, SCHIP, veterans’ services America has the best health care in the world.

(3) We support market-based energy reforms by opposing cap and trade legislation;

Drill, baby, etc.

(4) We support workers’ right to secret ballot by opposing card check;

ACORN.

(5) We support legal immigration and assimilation into American society by opposing amnesty for illegal immigrants;

Build a wall. Let Dobbs deal with the rest.

(6) We support victory in Iraq and Afghanistan by supporting military-recommended troop surges;

Wait… Didn’t we already win in Iraq and Afghanistan?

(7) We support containment of Iran and North Korea, particularly effective action to eliminate their nuclear weapons threat;

Since the two wars we’re already involved in are going so well, we’d like to start two more! This, by the way, will lower the deficit.

(8) We support retention of the Defense of Marriage Act;

The gays are worse than the Mexicans.

(9) We support protecting the lives of vulnerable persons by opposing health care rationing and denial of health care and government funding of abortion

If we could legally change our name to the party of old white Christians, we would.

(10) We support the right to keep and bear arms by opposing government restrictions on gun ownership.

#10 is our solution to #5.